I find this place to be a source of therapy and comfort. I know many people who read my blogs are ones who are in the same shoes as I am, worse ones or even ones that I can’t comprehend. Either way, pretty sure we could all use a vacation from our bodies.
A few days of having a “normal” regular heart beating, being able to take a deep breath, no back, neck and sternum problems would be pretty cool to experience again. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I am ungrateful or having myself a pity party, it’s that life can be rough at times.
Chronic pain and life long diseases has its good and bad days, but it’s always present.
To be honest, lately it’s been hard hearing from peers complaining about how they have to get up early and go to work all day. The day that I get up and have energy to last me more than a couple of hours will be a day(if that ever happens) I’ll never forget.
People forget, heck I forgot that congenital heart patients hearts are working in overtime all the time. So, naturally my energy will be less than a normal working fine heart.
Although I have some control(eating, exercising, etc) of managing my heart defect, in other ways, it’s completely out of my control and is one of the most humbling and scariest things to experience every single day.
So, I probably won’t get that vacation from my body, but I’ll settle for the joy of hoping to get to Heaven one day and survive the best I can with the unique body God gave me.
Don’t give up on the hard days people! I keep reminding myself, that all this suffering will be worth it one day, God willing.