Yep, it’s true.
Even though 2018 has just begun, I already want this year to be over.
Preparing for open heart surgery, the actual surgery, recovery process and so much more in between all that basically takes a full year(sometimes even more). So, can we just fast forward to the 2019? Ok, maybe not, but boy am I looking forward to 2019 already.
Although, it’s going to be a very long and tiring year, I am really trying not to waste away the days. But, of course that is way easier said than done. If there is anything I’ve learned from my last two open hearts, is to keep busy until that dreadful day in June.
And that’s exactly what I am going to do. I start another round of Grad classes soon. I am working a lot or as much as I physically can handle. Trying to get in the best physical shape possible for a faster recovery(yea I’m that awkward girl at the gym that thinks she can lift weights but nope). And of course spending every possible moment with the people I love, especially my little nieces and nephew.
If you follow me on instagram, you might know I posted my word of the year recently. My word of the year is “bravery.” After praying about a word of the year, bravery kept coming to me. It actually takes a lot of courage to not only go through another open heart surgery, but surrender yourself to a new surgeon and care team in a different state. Especially, after you put so much trust in your last care team. Not that they did anything wrong. In fact, they saved my life thus far, but it’s time for a new route. It takes so much energy, both physically and mentally to truly be at ease with surrendering your body to what really are complete strangers, yet people you want to call your heroes.
Then, the truly hard part is you hope and pray that the surgery will be successful and worth it in the end. Talk about bravery?! I might not be that brave(ask my family), but I will pray for the grace to live out the word bravery during this year. I know I will be faced with a lot of hard decisions once again and have to legally sign paperwork that no 29 year old should shave to sign. But, I’ll be reminded by my word of the year to embrace what it means and hope to come out stronger on the other side.
I’ll be 30 at the end of this year. Yikes!! But, honestly, I can’t freaking wait. I have always said, my thirties are going to rock. And if I can get through this year, It gives me hope that the next decade is going to be nothing but pure joy, gratitude and whole lot of fun. I can’t wait.
Cheers to a healthy and quick(maybe not that quick, but you get the point) 2018!